Not Somehow, But Triumphantly

“Not somehow, but triumphantly.” I researched the origins of this phrase and found multiple possibilities. So, whoever first penned this saying, thank you. I learned this phrase at Umri Christian Hospital in India. This sign is at the entrance to the nursing school. 

Since I saw the sign, that phrase and the indomitable women who use it as their motto in that rural nursing school have stuck with me. The phrase came to mind this morning as I sat in our Easter service. I was reminded of the tenacity of those women, determined to learn how to take care of their community as the hands and feet of Jesus with what they had available to them. Lately, I feel like I have been living with the motto of “Somehow.” I was kicking myself for not emulating their tenacity, but then I remembered there is always a “both, and”. I am learning we can be triumphant while we lament. We can be triumphant while we are real about our situation. Both can be true at the same time.

I am learning about embracing tension right now, so that word has been on my mind. Easter is full of tension, embracing the grave and resurrection, the burial and the miracle, the waiting and the celebration, the darkness and the light, the lament and the triumph. The resurrection of Jesus, and the promise of the resurrection of our broken bodies one day. Good Friday and Silent Saturday are easier for me to embrace in this season of life, but I know that the hope of Resurrection Sunday is also for me, even if I don’t feel it’s reality right now. 

The burial is easier for me to lean into right now because I feel like my life as it was before was crushed and buried. I know from my love of plants that a lot happens under that dirt. A few weeks ago I planted seeds to start plants for our new community garden at church. Just a tiny seed, some dirt, water, light, and bam! Super cute cucumber plants! I wish it was that easy to produce results in life too. This song “Burial” by Mitch Wong has been encouraging to me: 

“God I'm letting go

Of everything that's fading

Trading in the old

I'm a new creation

It's no longer I who live but Christ

Open up my eyes

There's a miracle after the burial

The seed must fall

Before the bud, the bloom, the beautiful

And tears may last the night before the joy

My faith is pressing on to the reward

You're my reward”

I don’t know how long this phase under the dirt will be, but I know there is a miracle coming. And in that belief, I realize my “Not somehow, but triumphantly” spirit has been here all along. I have believed that truth throughout these years, even when I can’t see a glimmer of anything changing. If you feel buried too, remember there is a miracle after the burial. Something will bloom in a way we least expect. The burial can suck, AND we can confidently hold hope for the miracle. Both can be true at the same time. 

“Now Somehow, But Triumphantly.”